Hey-you. Ya, you.

Hey-you. Ya, you.
I have worked with infants and the elderly I have done good deeds and have been priviledged to work in theatre and visual arts. I've driven taxi and built furniture, I have modelled and raised a great child...

I'm not cut out for the grind of 9 to 5, but some job security would be nice.

Small dreams come true

I now own a 31' 1975 Airstream Excella 500

I received an email from a woman who said she had seen my ad on the internet-( since she made no mention of bondage gear, I could only assume she meant she had seen one of the many ads I had posted looking for an Airstream. ) Yes, she did know of an Airstream for sale in Nova Scotia, a 1975 Excella. I asked her what I thought were all the right questions about it, and pretty soon decided I wanted to see this one in person... "I'll come and see it this week," I told her< "Unless you're in Cape Breton or some other remote place, 'cause I want to tow it to Hubbards...," I'm in Fox Point" she said. That's when I got the goosebumps, Fox Point is only about 12 miles from Hubbards. So I went to see it, trying to keep in mind the 3 points I called the deal breakers - if there was end sag, spongy floor, or mouse poop, I told myself I'd walk away. It was a lovely sunny day when I drove out to see it, lovely gleaming ship, right at the ocean side on a private beach. I did what I though was a thorough check, got underneath, and even reached blindly into back corners, behind credenzas and into walls looking for mouse poop. None. I lifted the vinyl floor up near the door, and the plywood under was discoloured, but dry, with no rot. I knocked the owner down by $500(!) and put a deposit on it then and there. It even has the original awning, just missing three clips. So, I went away happy.

Then it rained all week. I went back today to pay the remainder, and the previous owner was good enough to show me all the inner workings of the stove and other appliances and fixtures. I looked under the vinyl again, but this time it was wet- so I thought-"Hey, I own this baby now" and I pulled up a large section of the vinyl. Ta Da, there was a small rotted area of floor in the corner by the lounge. Wet and rotted. The door had been leaking and water pooled in that corner, it looked like this has been going on for some time. Oh well, my problem now, eh? So I stopped at a Marina in Chester and talked with some guys who were overhauling their boats (If anyone knows about wood preservation, it'll be these guys, right?) So I got some great advice, tips on products and offers to help. The rot in the floor may not be as bad a situation as I thought. I feel charmed. The universe is conspiring to rain blessings down upon me. The next thing is getting it towed to Hubbards, to Iain and Peter's for the summer- they've rented it for the summer to use while the renovate their home. So the trailer will stay down on the South Shore for now, near all the helpful boat guys I met today...

InHouse Productions

InHouse Productions

Buster Keaton as The Projectionist

Free Crap

Free Crap
Piece of shit couch

I have a Piece of shit couch I no longer want or need. It looks a little worn, but an old blanket thrown over it will do wonders for it, cosmetically speaking. It is basically clean (just pretty old) and actually has some great features like:

It is a pull-out bed that has half the springs missing, so you can tell unwanted house guests that you'd offer to let them crash at your place, but your piece of shit couch has half the springs missing, and no longer works as a double bed.

BUT...

It is long and firm and sturdy, and adequate for one guest if you really want to offer it as a place to crash. It is also great for laying on to watch movies, it's really quite comfortable. It IS great to lay on but I have never gotten laid ON it, so it has no DNA residue to worry about.



It no longer has legs, so you can't lose anything under it. It weighs about a tonne, so if you put it in your barn or shed or cottage no one will ever steal it. Unfortunately for me, if I leave it by the roadside, it is also unlikely anyone will steal it, so if you want a piece of shit couch, you can have it for free.

RIP

Rest In Pieces
Rest in Pieces, piece of shit couch
My piece of shit couch is no more. It has been hacked into small bits and stored in my basement until "throw it all away day"- so I couldn't get rid of a perfectly good (*albeit fugly) piece of serviceable furniture that would have surely been useful to someone- but noone wanted it. What ever happened to starving artists? Desperate students? I thought it would look at home on the front porch of a trailer, but no, so now it's gone.

Good-bye, piece of shit couch-I never loved you.

My Shiny Shiny Love

LandYacht of my heart.

I have a love of Airstream trailers that began when I first saw one of the stream lined aluminum lovelies in a photo on a Ry Cooder album. It was so cool, so clean so aerodynamic... Airstream, my shiny, shiny love.
The first time I stood in one, I felt as though the Mother Ship had called me to home. I would love to own one some day, maybe a 16 or 24 footer- but until then, I dream and look at photos, and stop to take pictures whenever I see one at the side of the road. I have polished one particualrly lovely one with my boobs.

I would love to see pictures of your Airstream if you have one- those who have the same love will understand- like pornography for robots and pilots of the highways, the sleek lines of the Airstream are more sensuous than any fleshy curves. If I were a robot, I'd want to fuck an Airstream. Spaceships, robots, Airstreams, I'm a StarTrekkian product of the 60's looking for some Aluminium satisfaction. Write to me if you speak the language.

Blomidon

I made this on a ceramic tile

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