Buster Keaton as The Projectionist

Free Crap

Free Crap
Piece of shit couch

I have a Piece of shit couch I no longer want or need. It looks a little worn, but an old blanket thrown over it will do wonders for it, cosmetically speaking. It is basically clean (just pretty old) and actually has some great features like:

It is a pull-out bed that has half the springs missing, so you can tell unwanted house guests that you'd offer to let them crash at your place, but your piece of shit couch has half the springs missing, and no longer works as a double bed.

BUT...

It is long and firm and sturdy, and adequate for one guest if you really want to offer it as a place to crash. It is also great for laying on to watch movies, it's really quite comfortable. It IS great to lay on but I have never gotten laid ON it, so it has no DNA residue to worry about.



It no longer has legs, so you can't lose anything under it. It weighs about a tonne, so if you put it in your barn or shed or cottage no one will ever steal it. Unfortunately for me, if I leave it by the roadside, it is also unlikely anyone will steal it, so if you want a piece of shit couch, you can have it for free.

RIP

Rest In Pieces
Rest in Pieces, piece of shit couch
My piece of shit couch is no more. It has been hacked into small bits and stored in my basement until "throw it all away day"- so I couldn't get rid of a perfectly good (*albeit fugly) piece of serviceable furniture that would have surely been useful to someone- but noone wanted it. What ever happened to starving artists? Desperate students? I thought it would look at home on the front porch of a trailer, but no, so now it's gone.

Good-bye, piece of shit couch-I never loved you.